Hippowhataphobia?
by forensicsfan
Summary: In response to a Snicker's challenge. Phobia, bugs, and gems.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own them. I didn't create them. I don't profit from them. And as always, I would love to chat with George over coffee.  
  
**Author's Note:** Yes, the William Petersen movie mentioned in here is a real film.  
  
**Spoilers:** Not really unless you think that the characters on CSI are actually real.  
  
This is in response to a challenge that I issued to my fellow Snickers.

* * *

"You know, I really would have been ok without knowing that." Sara Sidle remarked with a hint of disgust in her voice.  
  
"Knowing what?" Nick Stokes sauntered into the break room, an apple in hand. When Sara didn't answer, he cocked an eyebrow and turned towards their boss Gil Grissom. "What?"  
  
He had an amused smile on his face as he answered the young CSI. "Cockroaches can live for days without their heads."  
  
Nick grimaced and glanced down at his apple and then over at Sara, suddenly deciding that he was no longer hungry. "Want an apple, Sara?"  
  
She held a hand up in disgust. "No thanks."  
  
Nick set the apple down on the break room table and looked at Grissom curiously. "What, do you have some case with headless cockroaches or something?"  
  
An impish expression flitted across Grissom's face. "Freeze dried actually."  
  
"Ew." Sara wrinkled her nose and glared at him. "Can we stop talking about cockroaches?"  
  
Grissom looked a bit amused by her discomfort. "Well the cicada only hatches every 17 years." He turned and left, chuckling to himself.  
  
Sara rolled her eyes and then glanced at Nick. "Do you have anything new on our case?" There was a bit of desperation in her voice. If there was one thing that completely creeped her out, it was large bugs.  
  
He grinned. "As a matter of fact I do. That residue we found on the mouthpiece of the tuba is a chewable form of Echinacea."  
  
Sara raised an eyebrow. "So our victim was a health freak that played a large instrument."  
  
"Well, that's not all." Nick continued. "He apparently suffered from Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia." He gave her a smug smile.  
  
She raised an eyebrow. "Hippo what?"  
  
He grinned. "Fear of long words."  
  
Sara rolled her eyes. "And how are you so sure?"  
  
"Well you know how we found that copy of 'Psychosis for Dummies'?" He replied.  
  
She nodded. "Yeah, I thought it was strange." She furrowed her brow. "Is it just me, or do you think those books have gone a little too far?"  
  
He looked at her quizzically. "What do you mean?"  
  
"For example, I bet in 'Cooking for Dummies' that there are directions for making toast." She quipped.  
  
Nick's eyebrows arched upward and then he pursed his lips together in such a way that it made Sara think that perhaps he owned a copy.  
  
She started to laugh. "You own 'Cooking for Dummies' don't you?"  
  
He raised his eyebrow in challenge. "Only because my sister Lisa and one of her friends wrote the book."  
  
"Oh." Sara tried to stifle a smile.  
  
He continued. "And there are directions for making toast." He watched her for a moment to see how she would react and then started laughing. "You are so gullible, Sara."  
  
She narrowed her gaze at him and slugged him in the arm. "That's not funny."  
  
He was thoroughly amused. "Yes, it was."  
  
Sara decided to get back to the subject of their case. "What about the book we found at the crime scene?"  
  
Nick deadpanned. "Nope, they didn't write that one."  
  
Sara rolled her eyes. "Nick, the case." She was having a hard time keeping a straight face at how ridiculous he was being.  
  
He chuckled softly. "Ok." He put his game face back on. "There were notations in the margins, mostly focusing on Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia."  
  
"I'm not sure I understand the relevance to our case." Sara observed. "He was a health freak, so maybe he had more than one phobia."  
  
Nick nodded with a grin. "This brings me to several other pages." Nick turned the pages of the book. "Back here he made notations about scented pens, bubble wrap, and liver and onions. Although I can completely understand why anyone would be afraid of liver and onions."  
  
Sara wrinkled her nose again. "Me too." She glanced at the book. "Anything else."  
  
"It's almost like he used this book as a journal." Nick turned to one particular page and pushed it across the table so Sara could get a better view. "Look here."  
  
"That's strange." Sara glanced up at Nick a bit perplexed. "Who in the world is William Petersen?"  
  
Nick had a studied expression. "I checked and found out that he's an actor that got his start in theater in Chicago before doing film." Nick pointed to a notation midway down the page. "It says here that he thinks he developed Williampetersenaphobia after seeing the movie 'Kiss the Sky'. Apparently, his character spent a little too much time in the nude for our vic's taste."  
  
Sara raised her eyebrows as she leafed through the book and then glanced at Nick. "I don't want to sound judgmental, but this guy sounds weird. He's got the lyrics to 'Oklahoma' in here. Not to mention an entire page of smiley faces."  
  
"I think disturbed is a better word. In any case, I think we have our work cut out for us." Nick interjected.  
  
"Hey, did you see this?" Sara's voice betrayed her disbelief.  
  
"See what?" Nick focused on where she was pointing at on the page. "Rattlesnakes?" He glanced up and looked at Sara curiously.  
  
She regarded the page strangely. "This is just getting creepier by the second." She glanced up at Nick. "He's afraid of Barbie dolls, but not poisonous snakes."  
  
Before Nick could respond, Greg came rushing into the room. "Turn the TV on. You'll never believe this!" He grabbed the remote and turned it to the news.  
  
"In a bizarre chain of events, Nevada State Department of Fish and Wildlife personnel and the State Patrol following up on a tip from an unnamed source intercepted a cargo truck carrying an unusual load. Listed on the manifest were tornado shaped key chains headed for Topeka, Kansas, but inside, behind boxes and boxes of key chains in a cage, was Bruno, the polar bear cub missing from Las Vegas Zoo since last night. Other than being a bit woozy from sedatives, zoo personnel are hopeful that Bruno will be just fine. The thief however, isn't so fortunate. He was admitted to the hospital with arm and leg lacerations, which we assume were sustained when the polar bear was taken. He'll have plenty of time to let those heal in the county jail. Back to you, Dan." The young reporter smiled widely for a bit too long as the TV finally faded back to the news anchor.  
  
Greg turned towards Nick and Sara. "Can you believe that?"  
  
Sara looked at him incredulously. "What kind of idiot steals a polar bear cub?"  
  
Nick let out a chuckle. "You know what they say, 'If it bleeds, it leads'. Or in this case, if it makes someone bleed it leads."  
  
Greg began flipping channel. "Hey, I wonder if there's anything exciting on the Discovery Channel." His tone clearly implied he wasn't interested in the scientific value of the channel.  
  
Nick turned his attention back to the book he and Sara were looking at. "Greg, they don't have those kinds of shows on the Discovery Channel."  
  
"I was looking for a program on how eyeglass frames are made." Greg stammered the first thing that came to mind.  
  
"Uh, huh." Nick responded doubtfully.  
  
Sara raised a curious eyebrow as if not quite following him.  
  
Nick chuckled softly and whispered across the table. "He's gonna have to go home if he wants to watch the Playboy Channel."  
  
Sara smirked, letting out a chuckle of her own before glancing up at the clock. "Hey, guys, shift's over."  
  
Nick looked at her skeptically. "Since when are you a clock watcher, Ms. Workaholic?"  
  
She smirked at him. "Well, I don't know about you, but I have plans." She got up and headed out the door.  
  
Nick sat back in his chair, a smile gracing his face as Greg turned to look at him. The young lab tech turned CSI had disappointment on his face. "Just when I'd worked up my courage to ask her out again, she leaves before I get the chance."  
  
Nick held his tongue and patted Greg on the back before he headed out of the break room to return the book to evidence.  
  
An hour later, there was a knock on the door to Sara's apartment. With an expectant smile on her face, she opened the door, only to have it be replace by a quizzical expression.  
  
A man clad in a black suit and tie with a chauffeur's cap on his head held out a single red rose to her. "Ms. Sidle, your car awaits."  
  
"My car?" She looked skeptical. She had been waiting for someone, but this was not who she was expecting.  
  
The man smiled. "The gentleman asked me to give you this." He handed her a small card.  
  
As Sara read, a smile crept across her face.  
  
The man offered her his arm and she walked with him out to the parking lot where a limousine was idling. He opened the back door for her and as she stepped inside, she heard a low whistle.  
  
"You look amazing, Sara." A smile spread across Nick's face and his drawl was slow and easy.  
  
"And you're full of surprises." She leaned over and kissed him, smiling against his mouth. "What's this all about? I though we were picking your parents up from the airport. I didn't realize that I was supposed to dress up." She was immediately suspicious.  
  
He let out a chuckle and put his arm around her shoulder. "Why does this have to be about anything? And for the record, I think you look pretty damn sexy in your blue jeans."  
  
She raised an eyebrow. "Nick."  
  
"Ok, I'll admit that I felt the need to treat you special." He smiled at her and leaned over to kiss her cheek.  
  
She leaned into him. "I always feel special when I'm with you." She laced her fingers with his, a smile spreading across her face.  
  
"I just thought that since we decided to go public that we should celebrate." He caressed her face with his fingers and turned her face towards his before placing a soft kiss on her lips.  
  
Sara brushed his lips with her thumb as he pulled away. "I love you, you know that don't you?"  
  
He grinned. "Yes, I do, and I love you too."  
  
She grinned at him. "So, what time does their flight get in?"  
  
"In a little while." He was being purposely evasive hoping she wouldn't notice that they weren't headed toward the airport.  
  
"What are you up to?" That was the thing about Sara; she could read him like a book.  
  
Knowing that if he prolonged it any longer, she'd guess before he had the chance. He caressed the side of her face with one hand and leaned in to kiss her briefly. As he pulled away, he smiled. "I love you. I've loved you for a long time and I think that I've known since the day I met you that you were always going to be a part of my life."  
  
Sara's eyes started to widen.  
  
His smiled spread into a grin. "I can't imagine not being with you." He reached into the pocket of his jeans and pulled out a small black velvet, box opening it as he held it up to her. "Would you marry me?"  
  
Sara sat there completely shocked. At first she didn't say a word. She looked at the ring in the box and then at Nick and then back at the ring before looking at Nick and letting out a squeal as she threw her arms around his neck. "You just asked me to marry you!"  
  
He chuckled and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Yes, I did, but you haven't answered me yet."  
  
She pulled away and looked at him again and then threw her arms around his neck again. "You asked me to marry you!"  
  
There was a teasing tone in his voice. "I'm not sure I'm clear what your answer is."  
  
She pulled away grinning. "Yes." She giggled. "Yes."  
  
"I was hoping you'd say that." He pulled the ring out of the box and grabbed her left hand. "Well I guess you're going to need this then." He slipped the ring on her finger and just stared at it for a moment.  
  
Sara lifted her hand and then looked at him, throwing her arms around his neck again. "I get to marry you!"  
  
Nick hugged her close. "And I get to marry you."  
  
Sara glanced out the window and looked at Nick quizzically. "We're not going to the airport."  
  
He smiled, letting out a sigh. "I wanted to take you somewhere and do this right, but I thought you'd figure it out before we got there and I wanted to surprise you." He reached over and trailed his fingers down her cheek. "Sometimes you're just too damn good of a CSI for your own good."  
  
She looked a little smug and leaned towards him, her lips stopping a fraction of an inch before his. "I'll take that as a compliment." She leaned in and closed the distance between them.  
  
By the time they actually got to the airport, the plane from Dallas had landed and Nick's parents were already collecting their luggage. As Nick and Sara approached hand in hand, his parents looked up and wide smiles spread across their faces. The refracted light coming through Sara's diamond engagement ring was the first thing they noticed.  
  
It took the night shift crew a little longer to figure things out.  
  
That night as Nick and Sara sat at the break room table waiting for their briefing, Warrick and Greg both had come in and out of the break room a couple of times with strange expressions on their faces, neither one of them really able to figure out what was different.  
  
When Grissom walked in, he shot a curious glance in the direction of the two CSIs, but even he didn't quite pick up on the one carat diamond ring on Sara's left hand.  
  
However, as Catherine breezed in offering an apology for being a few minutes late to the briefing, she stopped, her jaw dropping slightly as she noticed the ring before letting out a throaty laugh.  
  
Grissom raised a curious eyebrow. "Do you mind sharing what you find so funny, Catherine?"  
  
She looked a bit smug as she gestured towards Nick and Sara. "Oh, I think that Sara has something she'd like to share, wouldn't you say so, Nick?" For her, all the pieces slid together quite clearly as to what had been going on between them over the last several months.  
  
Grissom looked slightly annoyed at Catherine, but glanced over at Sara expectantly, raising a single eyebrow. "Sara? Nick?"  
  
With a wide grin on his face, Nick responded a bit cryptically. "Oh, I gave Sara a gift after shift this morning."  
  
Grissom narrowed his gaze, still not noticing the ring on Sara's finger as she brushed a bit of her hair back behind her ear. The grin on her face was as wide as Nick's.  
  
Warrick finally noticed and let out a low chuckle. "Damn, how did I miss that?"  
  
Greg's eyes widened as he looked at Sara and then a slightly panicked expression crossed his face as he looked at Nick.  
  
Grissom was beginning to get exasperated, but then he had pulled a double shift and hadn't had any coffee in several hours and he felt a headache coming on. "Will someone just tell me what's going on?" It was then that he noticed the ring. His eyebrows arched upward and a boyish smile began to play at his lips.  
  
Nick reached over and took Sara's left hand in his, lifting it up so everyone could plainly see the ring on her finger. He grinned at Sara and then looked at the rest of the team. "Sara and I are getting married."  
  
There wasn't a sound in the room for a moment until Greg fainted and hit the floor with a thud as the shock that Sara Sidle was no longer available finally set in. 


End file.
